What’s so great aboot Canada, eh?

As a United States ambassa-dog, I feel it’s my duty to report back on my recent visit to Nova Scotia. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still an American girl (props to Tom Petty), born in the USA (props to Bruce Springsteen), but O! Canada!

Here are some of the great things aboot the country in general and Nova Scotia in particular in no particular order.

Canadian television. There are no commercials for pharmaceutical products. Ever. You notice it pretty quickly which just goes to show you how over-saturated we are in the US. The other cool thing is that news coverage is regional yet available to the whole country via satellite. Thus, people in the Maritimes can watch “Northbeat” which covers Nunavut and find out what’s happening to the Inuit and other native peoples living along the Arctic coast. When was the last time you watched an American program produced by native peoples detailing their daily lives, interests, hopes, dreams and challenges?

The Olympics. Watching Olympic coverage on Canadian television was so refreshing. The announcers don’t over-analyze the athletes and they say things like: “He came in eighth this year, a fine improvement over the last games!” They don’t disparage their athletes for not finishing on the medal stand, but rather, praise them for the enormous effort put forth just to get there.

It’s green and clean. Americans have a lot to learn from their northern neighbors when it comes to living green. Even the tiny town of Lunenburg, Nova Scotia collects food scraps and other organic waste and recycles them in a city compost center. Residents can then get free, non-chemical fertilizer for their gardens and lawns.

Smoking not glorified. Unless you’re watching an American program, you don’t see people smoking. And if you DO want to buy cigarettes, you won’t find them prominently displayed up front in every grocery and convenience store. Oh, they have them alright. But they’re back behind the counter in a plain, non-sexy display stand.

So, while they may be just a tad over-the-top on hockey, Canadians are an amazing bunch. What a pity we Americans are so xenophobic we hardly ever take the time to get to know more about them.

Pop Quiz: Can YOU name the Prime Minister of Canada? Didn't think so. But don't worry, I couldn't either before I went there. It's aboot time we Americans made the effort to know more aboot our wonderful neighbors to the north.

Things that make you go "h-m-m-m-m ..."

I was so excited when I saw John McCain's veep choice! Finally, that loopy old fart is showing some class and naming a smart, savvy, sexy woman to the ticket. Then my mommy told me it wasn't Tina Fey, it was some doofus from Hooterville. And not the good Hooterville, some weird Hooterville in the middle of East Nowhere, Alaska. I only hope that someone, somewhere has explained to her "just exactly what the Vice President does."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUMWJoLR1sM

When McCain announced his choice, Governor Palin invoked Hillary Clinton's historic White House bid. I can't wait for the Vice Presidential debates when Joe Biden gets to say: "I know Hillary Clinton. Hillary Clinton is a friend of mine. And Governor, you are no Hillary Clinton." Stay tuned.

They wanted the tira misu

ROME (Reuters) - About 60 newly hatched sea turtles lost their way during their ritual passage to the sea and marched into an Italian restaurant instead, a conservation worker said on Monday.

The baby turtles -- which ended up under the tables of startled diners at the beachside restaurant -- were probably thrown off track and lured by the eatery's bright lights, said Antonio Colucci, who was called to help rescue the group.

I love it that they "marched" into the restaurant. They didn't amble, they didn't mosey, they didn't make reservations, they just marched right in.

You go, baby turtles!!

Today's Haiku

I flee in terror
Unhappy beast spews green goo
Disposal ... broken

Dateline: Georgia

Yes, I know I’m best known as a political dogblogger, but I’m not talking about the Georgia full of greedy Russians. It’s the OTHER Georgia, the one where Billy Bob, Jimmy Bob and Goober Bob leave their trailer early in the mornin’ and go a-huntin’ fer ‘possum and other elusive critters.

Well! Guess what they found? A dead Bigfoot. Which they promptly put in a big ole carton and then froze it fer a month and didn’t tell nobody. Til yesterday.

They held a press conference with pictures and everything. According to Curt Nelson, a scientist at the University of Minnesota who performed a DNA analysis on Bigfoot, one of the two samples came from a human and the other was 96 percent from an opossum.

The AP reports that their spokesman is saying the DNA samples may not have been taken correctly and may have been contaminated, and that he would proceed with an autopsy of the alleged Bigfoot remains, currently in a freezer at an undisclosed location, which I’m guessin’ is right back of Jimmy Bob’s toolshed.

Now, why are they a-doin' that? Bigfoot’s kin are grieving!! They need closure!! Put him back you redneck morons!!

The Theme

Like winter's first snow

It's great for a day or two

Then it drives you nuts

In Memoriam

We lost two of the greats this weekend. To Bernie and Isaac, thanks for sharing your gifts. You are missed.

The Real Beijing

Somewhere during the upcoming coverage of the Olympics, I'm sure the media will try to do a piece on "the real Beijing" - I'll be interested to see it. There's no doubt in my mind the Chinese have tried to "olympicize" their hutongs, little pocket neighborhoods in the city that haven't changed much in the past 200 years. After all, the Beijing Olympics are all about showcasing China as a superpower, and the gentle pace of life in the hutongs is a step back in time. A time when there was scant heat or running water, and very little electricity for refrigeration or light.

We were lucky enough to find a hutong during our visit three years ago. It was probably six square blocks of one of the most amazing markets I've ever seen. There was a whole street devoted just to the sale of cicadas. In the city, especially a concrete monolith like Beijing, residents long for a feeling of connectedness to nature. Having a cicada or a cricket in the house brings good luck (and the illusion that you're living in the country, I guess). So they sell these elaborate little clay houses for the cicadas and crickets. But let me tell you -- some of those Chinese cicadas are pretty huge. We saw more than one stall selling them with little leashes so you could take them out for a walk. Another street was devoted to chickens, and chicken parts. Live chickens stacked in cages one above the other. Little dried chicken feet sold in bunches. The "end caps" as we like to call them in America, you know, the little showcased items at the end of an aisle, often held tubs of worms for feeding the chickens and cicadas. There was a store that sold erhus - an instrument kind of like a Chinese violin, only with three strings. Although we were the only Westerners there that day, apparently we were not the first to find the erhu store. The manager broke into a rendition of "Yankee Doodle" when we walked by!

Even back in 2005, Beijing was gearing up for the Olympics of course. Renovations were underway in the Forbidden City and at the Summer Palace. And the "Bird's Nest" was just breaking ground. But our hosts made sure we saw where the Olympics were going to be held. The sense of anticipation and pride was palpable even then.

So last night I watched the opening ceremonies with a sense of awe. Say what you will about the Chinese government's human rights abuses. In my opinion, the United States has no room to talk on this issue. The average Beijing-er is no different from the average Chicagoan, or the average Parisian, or the average human anywhere. They love their children, and they love their country and they are proud to be who they are. They have done something beautiful and marvelous and they should be honored for their efforts.

I wonder about that little hutong market. It's about three blocks down from where Mayor Daley (and President Bush for that matter) are staying. I'd be willing to bet that if it is still there, it's been given a "facelift" for visiting dignitaries. That would be a travesty for sure. In that exotic and wonderful place, there was a happiness and vitality that, for me at least, epitomized the spirit of Beijing.

Bravo, Beijing, and Shih-shih for a wonderful opening ceremony.

Today's Haiku

I look everywhere

The clicker, it is missing

Don't make me get up

Unbifurcated Garments

Anyone who knows me knows I am a BIG fan of unbifurcated garments. That's why I was so thrilled to see that there's a postman out there who is lobbying the mailcarriers union to adopt the "Male Unbifurcated Garment" (aka "kilt") for comfort's sake.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20080807/ap_on_fe_st/odd_postal_kilt_1

Not only are they comfortable, they're incredibly stylish. And they don't chafe.

-- Miss Daisy

Beijing Toll Booth

Not EVERYTHING drives me crazy. Some things are just plain groovy and worth sharing with y'all. So ... although this is definitely not as spectacular as the Olympic stadium, I still thought it was pretty cool. This is a (rather blurry) picture taken from our bus window at a tollbooth on the highway between downtown Beijing and the airport. Check out the level of detail, it really is amazing!
-- Miss Daisy

The Story of Stuff

My very good friend Cooper sent this to me. I hope you will make some time to watch it. And then send it to your friends. -- Miss Daisy

http://www.storyofstuff.com/index.html

Blowin' in the Wind

This picture was taken today as President Bush was leaving for China. Forget the goofy look on his face, what I want to know is: what is UP with his hair? Or rather, his lack of it. He's got a kind of Ben Franklin thing going on ... add some little square glasses and shoot, he's a dead ringer. What's next? Is he going to adopt the McCain comb-over? At least my candidate looks good in the wind.
-- Miss Daisy

Condiments of Mass Destruction

Well, at first tomatoes were the suspect. The CDC was SURE they were the salmonella culprit. When that didn't pan out, they started to suspect cilantro. It was clear to me that this was a salsa-borne illness. And what do you know, the latest vector is a jalapeno farm in Mexico.

Wake up, people!! Can't you see that they are trying to destroy us with CMDs ??

-- Miss Daisy

Guilt by Association or …We’ll Always Have Paris

According to the AP, Obama has dropped in the polls since McCain’s recent ad decrying his “celebrity” persona started running. You’re kidding me, right? Are there really some “undecideds” out there who are saying to themselves: “Hey! Check out Paris hangin' with Obama!” Hello! Did anyone notice they’re not even in the same frame at the same time? Their association is implied and apparently for some folks, that’s enough.

Unfortunately, Obama is too classy to stoop to the same tactics. Thankfully, I’m not. I’ve been thinking about who could make a cameo in an Obama response ad -- you know, some cantankerous old coot, a McCain contemporary, as it were. Here are my top choices.

-- Miss Daisy

Biba Manamko!

Guam is, at least according to the Chamorro (aka Guamanians to all you haoles out there), "Where America's Day Begins." I suppose it's true. The day starts 18 hours earlier there than it does in the Midwest. Which results in some major weirdness when you're from the mainland and you move there. But you eventually get used to things like "SuperBowl Monday". All the businesses are closed and most people take the day off to get drunk and watch the game. By half-time, it's not even noon.

Every May, the Chamorro celebrate Biba Manamko Week. Biba Manamko means "Long Live Our Elders." On Guam, it's cool to get old.

That's why I'm dedicating this post to Brett Favre. Biba Manamko, dude! And may you make it to SuperBowl Monday, 2009.
-- Miss Daisy

¿Qué puede hacer con esta perrita?

¿Qué puede hacer con una perrita quién habla español? No sé, pero esta perra sabe eso: tengo mucha suerte porque vivo en el Condado de Cook dondé hasta los muertos pueden votar. Si, no es raro para una perrita emitir una votación. ¡SI, SE PUEDE!
-- Srta. Daisy

And on the 8th day, God created Snopes

I'm sure you've gotten them, too. Those horrid emails about Obama. You know the ones I mean -- I don't even want to repeat what they say. But for some reason, in this unprecedented election, people are using the Internet to "swift boat" him, hitting the "forward" button to their entire address book with the stupidest, hate-filled crap imaginable. And here's the thing: the senders either don't know, or don't want to know, if the stuff is true.

That's why, on the 8th day, God created Snopes. Check it out my friends, good and bad, it's all on there: http://www.snopes.com/politics/obama/obama.asp

-- Miss Daisy

Yellow Dog

Most people don't think of dogs as being political. But, of course, they're wrong. I'm as red, white and blue as they come, but I'm what you'd call a "yellow dog democrat" -- and if you don't know what that means, you probably won't "get" most of my blogs.

Want to know what's driving me crazy lately? John McCain. What a loopy old fart he is! (And trust me, I know something about farting, but I digress ... ) The media seems to be giving him a pass on his faux pas -- it's almost like he's going to get the Reagan treatmeant. Was it really okay for him to sing "Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb Iran?"

I'm having deja vu. Only this time Art Linkletter is in prime time hosting "Grandpas Say The Darndest Things." Tune in. I believe it's right after GE Theater. -- Miss Daisy